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Why I’m Just Not Good at Showers (Err…not that kind)

If I sat down and wrote a list of all the things I am not good at, well… let’s just say it would be long. However, I know without a doubt what would be at the very tip, top of that list: Throwing/Attending Showers of any sort. 
As a female, and more importantly as a female of the American South, people just assume that I live for showers where I get to sit around with other women and “ohh” and “ahh” over gifts. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, when I got married, I flat out refused to have any bridal showers hosted in my honor. Refused. Why? Well, Adam and I were already living together. We had all the essentials we needed. Could I have registered for better place settings and cookware? Yeah. Did I? Absolutely not. The mere thought of sitting in a room full of women and opening up tupperware almost caused me physical pain so I opted out. Of course, I’ve attended the bridal showers for friends and family members over the years, but I can say with certainty that I never look forward to these events. They are brutal necessities required to maintain favor with society — kind of like going to the dentist. 
I’m slightly better at attending baby showers… especially for someone’s first kid. Granted, I still get slightly uncomfortable. (Psst! I mean, the kid is “technically” in the room. How awkward!) But, I do see the value of a group of people coming together to shower a family with all the things they might need to raise their newest addition. After all, it makes a lot more sense for a lot of people to spend $50 rather than for one couple to spend thousands. Perhaps that’s why, even though I still find them to be somewhat awkward and forced, I don’t necessarily dread baby showers in quite the same way as bridal showers. 
As you might remember from this post, I’m actually hosting a baby shower soon for a friend — as in, THIS weekend. To say that I’m flipping out a bit might be an understatement. Technically, I’m just in charge of providing the location (#florkenfirsthome) and the food. Thankfully, someone else is in charge of decorations and games. Still, as I put my list together this week of all the things that need to be done by 1 p.m. on Saturday, I feel like a fish out of water. I’m just not sure I have the “hosting” gene that most Southern women seem born with. 
So I’m planning my cucumber sandwiches, fresh hummus dip, and vegetarian pinwheels, and keeping my fingers crossed that I don’t completely screw this entire thing up. I feel like there is a LOT of pressure because the mom-to-be always takes a picture in front of the food table. Eek! That means that what I manage to piece together between now and Saturday will live on forever in photographs in some kid’s baby book. Geesh! That is pressure I just don’t need. 
So please excuse me while I go figure out what you call those serving pitchers with little spouts at the bottom. I think I’ll need a few to serve drinks to serve in those. Water perhaps? Maybe lemonade? Are these acceptable baby shower drinks!? Man, they really should offer crash courses on these things at some point in life… especially for the non-shower savvy gals like myself.

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  • Reply Jess Beer

    You'll be fine. I'd also pick up a pre-done veggie tray (so not worth the time to do yourself), maybe a fruit platter, cheese and crackers, etc. I also usually do sweet and sour meatballs in a crockpot – super easy. It's just meatballs (frozen or homemade) and the sauce is a jar of grape jelly and a bottle of cocktail or chili sauce. It looks weird at first, but melts together and is delicious – and usually a big hit.

    As for drinks, lemonade or some sort of punch is always a good bet, as is iced tea. I would get bottled water so it's easier for guests to grab – plus then you have any extras for yourself. I've hosted lots of showers, so feel free to email me and pick my brain. Good luck!

    April 7, 2015 at 3:57 pm
  • Reply hunterhd

    Kindred spirits, I tell ya. I hate them too. Are the games too cheesy? Do we even need games? ugh. The best baby shower I ever went to had a pictionary game and mimosas (for everyone but momma). I will require these same ladies to throw one for me if I ever get to that point in life. Good luck lady!

    I say all this but a part of me wonders why single people don't get a shower for just being single??

    April 7, 2015 at 4:08 pm
  • Reply Jenn @ Business, Life & Design

    I'm with you on the whole shower thing! I really don't think it makes sense for couples to get so many rounds of gifts when they get married (bridal shower, engagement party, potential bachelor/bachelorette parties, the actual wedding), especially since the majority of them are already moved out and managing to live on their own. Baby showers make a lot more sense to me (although I still don't like the concept of "gift parties") because you really do need so much junk for a baby and you don't have any of it yet!

    I hosted a baby shower and while I did a cake and fruit tray (and cutesy baby shower games), it really seemed like the focal point was the family and chatting, and if they were determined to be rude or make something go wrong, there wasn't really anything I could do to prevent it. So I'd say worry as little as you can! Because the people there will set the tone and there's not a whole lot you can do to influence how they behave.

    April 7, 2015 at 4:10 pm
  • Reply Cece

    Good luck!! I definitely do not have the hosting gene and I cannot stand baby shower games so I'm basically useless for shower planning. I will show up with a nice gift off your registry though!!

    April 7, 2015 at 4:15 pm
  • Reply Corner of Sass and Snark

    I hate showers. Probably because I've never had one. I hate hosting because OH MY GOSH the $$$$ you spend to help host is outrageous. I see nothing wrong with cake and punch, but everyone and their mother insists on a smorgasbord of shtuff.

    And I especially HATE showers when it is your 2nd, 3rd, or 4th marriage or baby. Enough with the asking for free shit!

    April 7, 2015 at 4:41 pm
  • Reply Amberly

    You are going to be great!! My sisters feel the same way. They were technically co-hosting my baby shower last month and were considering ditching it to go skiing instead because going to a shower was on their list of ways to be tortured haha.

    April 7, 2015 at 4:48 pm
  • Reply Brittany@TheLadyLawyer

    I feel the same way! Opening gifts in front of people at Christmas is bad enough..but all the attention on me while awkwardly opening in front of people I may or may not know..horror

    April 7, 2015 at 5:14 pm
  • Reply Sarah Elizabeth

    Bahaha this is awesome. Wishing you all the best! And maybe this is a truly diva-ish thing to say, but I don't understand why giving gifts off the wedding registry is the norm for a bridal shower! It would be much more fun if you could just make cupcakes and laugh with your friends rather than buy pots and pans for the bride and the non-present groom….

    April 7, 2015 at 6:59 pm
  • Reply Cassie Lee @ Sage the Blog

    You'll be awesome even if it's not totally your thing and I'm sure they will be appreciative anyways. I suck at them too and they are SO AWKWARD.

    April 7, 2015 at 8:31 pm
  • Reply Casey at The Messmers

    I feel the same way! I was so awkward about my wedding shower. I still feel uncomfortable about it even a year later. That is why for our baby shower I told our moms that it has to be a couples shower, with no games, at a bar/grill to make everyone feel comfortable. So really it is going to be a hangout that just celebrates the baby. I even told guests that all we want is for everyone to bring a book that was special to them growing up with a message inside for the baby so we can grow the library for the baby.

    Good luck hosting the shower this weekend! Let us know how it goes!

    April 8, 2015 at 3:27 pm
  • Reply The Jessa Olson Blog

    You can do it. I had a tough time with showers when we were getting married. We were already living together too. Also sip and see's are the weirdest things that I cant get my head around. After you get married you have ppl over to show off what you got as wedding gifts or baby gifts.

    April 9, 2015 at 4:14 pm
  • Reply Kay R.

    I can't wait to hear how the shower turned out. I'm sure you will be fine but i totally understand the fear. I am the same.

    April 13, 2015 at 4:09 am
  • Reply Melzie at Ribbons and Rotor Blades

    I was sooo nervous to throw my sister's bridal shower. I hadn't ever done it and there's so much pressure. Pinterest helped me with food and decor. Thank goodness. I haven't thrown a baby shower yet but I'm sure my time is coming when I'll have to. I'm sure your shower went amazingly well!

    April 20, 2015 at 11:21 pm
  • Reply Tori

    I don't blame you, they totally aren't my thing either! I'm providing the cake / cupcakes for my friends bridal shower, and just that responsibility is more than enough to keep me busy.

    May 10, 2015 at 2:22 am
  • Reply curtis03 Lewis

    Well dear I am also not good in throwing parties or wedding showers. But as you know, everyone have to throw a party on birthday’s so on this birthday I am throwing a grand party at venue New York. I am sure every friend of mine going to enjoy party.

    February 2, 2016 at 7:41 am
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